Psalm 69:3 NLT
'I am exhausted from crying for help; my throat is parched. My eyes are swollen with weeping, waiting for my God to help me.'
I read compline, quietly, slowly, reflectively. I read aloud, as I find I step into the meaning of the words best that way. With my head filled from the excitements and the debris of the day, I’m in danger of merely scanning the words with little acknowledgement of either their content or their source, so weary is my head. Speaking aloud slows down the speed at which my head wants to run my life. The very sound of them causes me to take notice.
I remember as I child I loved the experience of going to bed; peeling off happy days of play and imagined adventure with my clothes. Then it was sheets and blankets. The cool of the cotton sheets, the tightness of the blankets firmly tucked in, offered me security as I snuggled down in this cocoon of comfort, a feeling of well-being to my senses. It placed me in a good place to sleep. Even then, long before any overt response to God, it was important for me to complete a short cycle of prayer, I don’t know why. Perhaps the discernible presence of the God I didn’t yet know.
I find a process helpful to close out my day. I hate hanging on in a state of semi-wakefulness in front of the TV, lost between staying up and going to bed. Once overtaken by sleepiness, the very effort of going to bed is unpleasant. My final thoughts are grumpy. I don’t end the day well. When I close the day with compline, I choose the manner and the actual conclusion to my day. I note where I’m weary, parched for loss of God’s presence, blinded by circumstance. As I pray, I acknowledge this with thoughts that are stirred by my slow and deliberate reading aloud of the psalm. I’m carefully and deliberately packing away my day in an orderly fashion in preparation for sleep and for tomorrow.
So I reflect upon my day, acknowledge where I have lost sight of God and need replenishment.
QUESTION: Would taking charge of the closing of your day help to order your mind, refresh your spirit?
PRAYER: Lord Jesus, I’m glad that while I sleep, you remain in charge. Remind me of that when I wake.